won't let us waste our lives away.

Now. The first few days aka 5 days of break consisted of me absolutely crashing from my "survive finals diet" of red bull, adderall, and diet coke. I never hit so low from anything before. Ever. It was bad. I basically passed out.

So when I finally got on track, I was slightly more productive. Okay. So you know how I had to get a new MacBook in the beg. of fall semester because I accidentally spilled diet rasberry snapple on my old lappy? Well, I didn't get the chance to upload my music. Anyways, I spent the entire semester with two albums on iTunes. B.Spears' Blackout and Radiohead's In Rainbow. Talk about a diverse collection. (And it explains why B. Spears' is #1 on my last.fm) So I've been trying to sort/upload/update my iTunes library. It's fucking impossible. And I'm being all anal and trying to get the folders by Artist > Albums. Ugh. Whatever, maybe I should just stick to radiohead+b.spears?

But good things: I did a lot of great shopping in a v.short amount of time. I mean, it frightens me how quickly I can drop a grand in a matter of a few stores (3 yesterday). Talent that I'm sure my dad certainly doesn't appreciate. It's just so bad. I love it all. And everything is just so pretty and whenever I walk into Bloomingdales I'm just overwhelmed by beauty. How the counters and the floors just glisten. Beautiful. An admirer of fashion. But, it takes money to make money. Or, atleast, despite the fact, you look good. A.Wintour would approve. And we all know how appearances are so important. But, I really need to learn how to manage my finances.

Nah, I'll save that for next year.

just a little insight won't make this right.

I'm heading back to Lehigh tomorrow morning for rush. Let's just say, it's going to be interesting to say the least. OH! I got my haircut, it's absolutely awful. And those who saw it... eck much? Hopefully it'll grow out? I finally went shopping today, not very productive though. But I realized how it is SO EASY to just blow a grand at any second. I really need to get a job for the sake of learning how hard it is to make money.

18? days DOES NOT qualify as a winter break. It just wasn't enough. I didn't accomplish everything I wanted to. Although I must admit, I am pretty sastisfied/self-fulfilled with the stuff I actually did.

Why can't we just live like this forever? No school. No worries. No jobs. No worries. Eat. Drink. Sleep. Play.

I wish I was in LA with ck. :(

and another chance to make it right.

I've missed you all? hah. I doubt anyone's reads this anyway except passerby-ers? Let's just say I've been busy/lazy. But, for those who know me, something has terribly gone wrong. I haven't been in ANY MOOD to go shopping. I just don't want to for some reason? I don't want to buy anything, but I know I'm in a desperate need for a new wardrobe. Fucked up, I know.

Anyway, I've been defunked into the most not normal sleeping patterns this whole break. I basically go to sleep at 5 in the morning, and wake up a little before 6pm. 4pm if I'm lucky. I have officially become nocturnal. And, also, what's up with the no snow lately? I haven't even been able to wear my sweet boots that I brought for the snowy weather.

Here's to a New Year!

the pursuit of happyness.

Well, I guess I'll start with Happy Holidays! Hope you guys got everything you wanted and some stuff, not so much. haha There's nothing like drinking five bottles of red wine with your family and being so god damn joyful, you drop your camera into the hottub. (Oops!)

I always feel so sad for those people who are alone during the holidays. I honestly want to cry for them. Imagine how shitty the holidays must be for people with no family. You know, going to a restaurant, eating alone, ordering a roast turkey dinner with a double whiskey on the rocks. Long story short, I fell a tad guilty for always taking my family for granted.

When you where little, the holidays where all about the presents. But as you grow older, it's more about spending time with your family and the people you love. Or alteast, that's what it should be about.

I watched The Pursuit of Happyness a few days ago and it was really good. It really just makes you think that not everyone has a happy ending. Because if we all where to work our asses off, then everyone would win, right? But this is the real world. And in the real world, there's winners and losers. And, well, that's where the competition begins.

there would be only one thing worse.

So I've decided that I'm going be very productive this break. Yeah, considering that I have til Janurary 9th to accomplish all this stuff, it's going to be quite a feat.

• haircut
• dye hair ? (jet black or darkdark brown)
  
• mani & pedi
• eyebrows waxed
• tanning ? NOT WORTH POSSIBLY BECOMING AN ORANGE LOBSTER
  
• work out / run
• eat healthy
  
• hang out w/ sara & others
  
• buy some cute clothes & accessories
• go to costco & get photos printed
• buy Grey's Anatomy Season 1 DVD for jw
  
• go to the library & borrow books to read
  
• catch up on my magazines
• watch movies that I've been meaning to watch

Hm, seems pretty complete. Anyway I'm officially done with my first semester at Lehigh. It sort of feels good, actually not really. There's so much that I should have done. Ever since I've been back my mom constantly nags me, "Oh if you don't get all A's." It just doesn't stop. Seriously, I didn't get all A's in high school, what legit assumption does she have to make that I will now? But, really, I do want to do well at Lehigh. I just don't know what happened. Actually that's a lie, I do. (I think?)